connecting*the*dots

So I headed into the city tonight to have a drink with woman I met on Nerve.

You never know about these things. I’ve been on a bunch of blind Nerve dates over the last year and the women i’ve met have ranged from a Bulgarian midget (uhm, sorry, make that ‘height challenged’) to a “voluptuous” sex crazed Vin Diesel fan on crack to a cool-ass Israeli designer chica (Efrat, be safe over there in the motherland, you here me?), so you never really know what you’re going to get.

Kinda like a box of chocolates.

So I met this woman tonight. To keep the innocent, well… innocent, I’ll call her Pippy until further notice. Pippy and I headed downtown to Bar 89 for a drink, but it was last call and Pippy wasn’t feeling the vibe anyway, so she pointed up the street to the bar on the corner. Sweet. Fanelli’s. My other favorite bar on Mercer. Totally different vibe.

Cool.

So we walk up Mercer, step inside and grab a seat at the bar. Before we know it, Bob becomes a part of the date. Bob the bartender, former prize fighter (he actually fought Larry Holmes in ‘73), was instantly spitting advice on women and relationships, digging into our pasts, dissing Pippy’s hometown of Chicago and laughing at my old digs in Montclair. I suddenly felt like I was on an episode of “The Fifth Wheel.”

Once I realized that Bob was just being Bob (after watching him haze a bunch of Brits at the other end of the bar) all was good. So we closed the bar, with Bob providing comic relief for us the entire time. As for the date, we got a chance to feel each other out, but since Bob commented on half of our conversation, I think we’ll need to try it again on a park bench… on the other side of town… where there are no Bobs.

Who am I trying to kid? This is New York City — there are Bobs on every corner here, and to be honest, I really wouldn’t have it any other way.

For the last two days, Dan, myself and the Ameritrade crew from Nebraska (that’s right, I said Nebraska) observed 10 active traders as they were walked through the prototype for the new trading platform we’re designing. We were a bit apprehensive going into it because we were adding numerous features and changing the paradigm of the trading model all together, but amazingly enough the response was enthusiastic and positive.

Of course some pretty bad design decisions in specific screens rose to the top through the interviews. By the 7th trader we were all covering our eyes and screaming at the mirror when they hit those areas. Dan and I even started a “task war,” pushing the moderator to lead the clients through each other’s shoddy screens. Yes, our professionalism deteriorated a bit, but we walked away with reams of notes and have a solid 3 weeks to crank out revisions for a second round of testing.

If all goes well (knock on wood) this product is going to be sweet when it hits the market.

splash!
i sunk straight to the bottom of those pools
on past the posers, players and the fools
right up to the core of her soul
oh shit
these depths could take a toll
on my everyday actions
the way i fall asleep at night
those lips
that demeanor
i’m on point fighting the good fight
to understand the vibe which i can only feel…
touch…
taste…
man
this afternoon’s gonna be a waste

Mr. Bush, Mr. Blair… since this war is much more about winning the hearts and minds from within Iraq, the Middle East and the watchful eyes of (former?) allies around the world than finding WMDs, maybe we should try a few new tactics. Well, of course I have a few ideas! I’m expecting you to take notes, but don’t worry, this won’t hurt too much.

1. Instead of placing American flags on fallen statues, roofs of buildings we occupy or on bridges we take over, etc., how about placing traditional Iraqi flags with a corresponding one that reads "freedom" in Arabic in it’s place? It promotes the idea of liberation not occupation. That is your stance, isn’t it?
2. Kill the radio broadcasts in Arabic that are making fun of Saddam. As much as these people hate him, you’re only patronizing their intelligence. It may work with Leno or Conan for our retarded American public, but it’s viewed as an insulting tactic around the world. The Arab world, specifically, gets a tad bit uptight when you make fun of an Arab leader… even if he is/was a dictator. We don’t need any more people with hate in their hearts against us. It’s a dumb move. Dumb and classless. Oh my bad, the CIA is in charge on this one… no wonder.
3. If we’re dumping billions into the war budject, we should have at least a few billions set aside to immediately move in and provide medical assistance. Temporary to begin with, perminant within a year or so. Build new, modern hospitals in strategic areas of the country in order for all people to get assistance. This, along with an irrigation system to provide fresh water throughout the country, would be the greatest investment towards the future of peace in the country.

See? That wasn’t so bad. You’re such big boys! Ok, now get out of my office and go fix the world. If you don’t no one will… right?