connecting*the*dots

Paces Village, my new apartment complex in Greensboro, North Carolina, communicates to me and my neighbors by attaching 8.5" x 11" memos to mounted clips next to our front doors. Whether the content is personal or a group spam doesn’t matter; we come home from a long day at work (or in my case, walking outside after a long day in my home office) to find a note swaying in the breeze.

Now, I’m really trying to believe that they mean well with these efforts, but this latest note had me shaking my head in disbelief:

November 19, 2005

Dear Residents,

This letter is targeted toward all of our female residents. I would like to take this opportunity to heighten your awareness to your surroundings. This means always keep doors and windows locked. This goes for your apartment as well as your car. When going from your vehicle to your apartment, especially at dark, make sure to have your keys out. Remember, a key is a great defense weapon. Aim for the FACE! Having a personal alarm devise or mace on your key ring is also a great idea. As we enter the Christmas season remember not to leave packages or any other personal items visible in your car, this is to tempting to thieves. If at all possible when walking to laundry or fitness area walk with your roommate, spouse or become buddies with a neighbor. This letter is not to frighten you but to make you aware that the crime rate goes up at this time of year. If you see anything or anyone suspicious on the property, please call the office, courtesy officer, as well as Greensboro Police. I want everyone to be as safe as possible this Holiday season. We are planning a Community Watch Meeting very soon. If anyone has suggestions, please let me know.

Thanks in Advance,

Holly Smith (not her real name)
Community Manager,
Paces Village Apts

You know, people ask me all the time if I miss living in the NYC area and I consistently tell them no, that is, not until I’m forced to deal with the poignant differences between an urban lifestyle and a suburban existence. Back in the city, my building manager (or even my former landlord in Brooklyn) would never have written a note like the one above. Shit, if I paid my rent and didn’t make too much noise, they didn’t care if I existed… and I liked it like that.

It’d be nice to believe that the management team here really does care, but the rambling note and their delivery style smells too much of corporate liability aversion for me to take it at face value.

Toto, we’re definitely not in Jersey City anymore.